Revision Paper

One nice bright afternoon Jake, my Sis and I were playing around out back of are old house. We were about eight, nine years old. It was a scorching hot summer day. The sun was beating down hard. I was sitting in the soft, green grass drinking a nice cold coca-cola. We always explored around are house. We were told that we cant go past are property line, which was the line of trees on the North side, through the wood to the neighbors lawn on the South side, to the road on the East side, and through the woods to the barbwire fence on the West side. We were all still playing and roaming around. We were over by the old, rusty barbwire fence.
“Let’s go over the fence to see what’s on the other side,” Megan said as she looked around to make sure no one was looking.
“Your mom said that we were not aloud to go past the fence though,” whispered Jake. But by the time Jake was finished talking Megan was already on the other side of the fence. She put her foot on the fence and pushed down. The barbed wires on the fence were pushing into the ground.
“Come on,” she said. I put one leg over the fence then the other. Jake followed me. Megan slid her foot off the fence after we got over. The woods were really thick on the other side of the fence were we had crossed to. Their were a ton of picker bushes that we had to dodge and crawl under.
“This is stupid we should just go back,” I told them.
“No let’s go a little further,” Megan demanded as she was crawling under a picker bush. I could see a big log cabin through the thick brush, it was pretty far away. My mom told us when we were younger that their was a family that was home schooled that lived back their. We came to an open spot by this dirt drive way. I saw something moving. We all walked a little closer to see about five boys digging a hole. They all looked up at us. Their faces were dirty and their close was all covered in dirt. Two of them looked younger and the other three looked a little older. We all looked at each other for a minuet.
“He ou kid bet ge off ar propy,” one the younger kids yelled. I couldn’t understand what he was saying.
The other younger kid yelled, “You better get off are property or ill shoot you with my bee-bee gun.” Jake, Megan, and I all started laughing. One of the kids started running toward his house to get a gun. We stopped laughing. I looked at Jake and we started running.
“Ah, ooh, aw, owe,” we all were saying as we were running through the picker bushes. I was in front of Jake and Megan was in front of me. Megan was running as fast as she could go and jumped right over the fence. I thought if she could make it I could make it. So I ran to the fence as fast as I could and cleared it by about a half a foot. When I hit the ground again I was still running. I saw Megan in the grass running toward the house. I looked back.
“Come on Jake jump it.” Jake was running about half speed it seemed like. He bent down to jump the fence. He took a dive over the old rusty barbwire fence instead of just trying to hurdle it. He landed almost face on the fence. His body came sliding forward and his foot was lying on the fence. I stopped and turned around and started running towered Jake.
“Oh crap,” I said to myself as I was running through the trees.
“Ahhh,” Jake moaned as he was lying in a bed of dead pine needles. His half white and now half red sock has caught in the fence. His shirt was pushed up to his neck and he had a huge blood scratch down the middle of his chest. Blood was dripping down the side of his stomach.
“Come on dude get up,” I said as I was untangling his ankle from the bloody, rusted fence. He got up and was still moaning. I ran back toward the house with Jake limping behind me. We got in the house and I slammed the sliding door shut. We were all panting like dogs, and Jake was shaking.
I started yelling, “Mom, mom their was these kids and we could have been killed and it was all Megan’s idea.”
“Slow down,” my mom said. We explained what happened and she cleaned up Jake’s wounds on his chest and ankle. It took about an hour for her to get all the pickers out of us. We told her about the boys going to get a gun and how they were saying they were going to shoot us for being on their property. We met all the boys later that week again and we all talked and played together. We had become good friends with the Sceilies boys after that. We would always play soccer and flash light tag. In the winter time we would all hide from each other in this big metal tube under the road. We would sit on the frozen water and wait for some one to find us. We have always been friends now, but still to this day Jake, Megan, and I still think that they were really going to try to shoot us with their bee-bee guns.

By: Kevin Vermillion